Tuesday, July 20, 2010

The Internet Spoke and Blizzard Listened

Well, it's a small victory, but one nonetheless. According to this article, the Real ID thing for both WoW and the upcoming Starcraft 2 forum launch has been scrapped because of the incredibly negative responses on the internet by fans. They have decided that "now is not the time" for the Real ID system and that in SC2 we will be able to post under our character name.

It's happened - we've been listened to. Now, hopefully, they'll know we mean business and maybe try and change some of the other things that have rubbed us the wrong was as long-time Blizzard fans? Who knows.

Saturday, July 10, 2010

On Gaming Again

While StarCraft and Blizzard, etc. are not putting in the elements that made the game awesome that I discussed earlier (LAN, Battle.Net chat, etc.), these geniuses HAVE decided to add an (oh-so-fucking-useful) Facebook application. Yeah, because that's what I want, Facebook on my StarCraft so that I can do...I dunno...NOTHING with it.

Also, they have decided in all their goddamn infinite wisdom to introduce people's REAL NAME alongside blog posts to "try and stop trolling" (that's internet for 'being a dick'). I'm sorry, this won't help, and you will probably only just increase harassment once you give EVERYONE YOU INTERACT WITH ON THE WEB your real name. I just...seriously? I think this argument states it best and I don't think I can out-word her because it really is a well-written article and all her points are valid.

Monday, July 5, 2010

On Protesting

While I admire and approve of the protest as a method of getting your voice heard, whether it be by the government, your employers or the university which you attend, I simply cannot outline enough that you must be prepared.

1. Know what you want out of the protest; know what you want changed, know what you want those who you are angry with to do - a list of demands or a charter is usually helpful.
2. Organize! I know that sounds similar to the previous, but I can't state this enough. Everyone should be on the same page for your reasons and what you want out of it.
3. Don't be an asshole. Violent protests never really got anybody anywhere. Peaceful is not only the way to go physically, but going around calling the people you're dealing with "fucking snakes" or "fucking liars", etc. simply won't help add credence to your cause - it will remove it. Eloquent negotiations are important.
4. Know the laws and regulations which govern the area you're in. If you start throwing around words like "you can't do [blank]" and "we have the right to [blank]", know for a fact that this is the case.

While I feel the only person who is remotely intelligent in this video (among the protestors) is the cameraman, despite his desperate yelling of "don't use brutality!" to hopefully catch something nice on camera, his point of "we have to be civil...we may be angry, but we have to be civil" I think make up for it a little. The asshole in the group can be heard yelling a lot in the background, with cameraman telling him to be quiet repeatedly.

A Little Bit of Random

Michael and I create a reality/sci-fi script over chat:

Michael: "Nick and Louise feel their marriage is deteriorating further. Blah blah blah" Close up on worried faces
me: exactly
[insert incoherent dialogue from boring people]
Michael: "He just doesn't LISTEN to me!"
"No one listens to you, honey. You're like wet carpet."
me: "you ALWAYS say that!"
me: "i know, it's because you're awful"
[aside to camera]
"i fucking hate my life"
Michael: NICK ADVANCES TO THE $20,000 ROUND!!!
Int: Director's office
Lots of flashing lights on a board light up
a TECHNICAL GUY turns around from a board
"We're experiencing record numbers of people disconnecting, Master!"
DIRECTOR: Hrm. Cut all power from the forward shields! Divert it in to the grav stabilisers!
DIRECTOR: Hack the internet! It's a firesale, everything must go!
HITLER: Mein gott, vhat am I doink here?
me: Int. Mon Cal starship
ACKBAR: Their shields are down, concentrate all fire on the super star destroyer...I mean...director's office
Michael: HITLER: Seriously, zis is a travesty. You people are horrible.
me: JEWISH COMEDIAN: And coming from him, that takes a lotta chutspah out of your gumption!
Michael: The SCENE COLLAPSES under BOMBARDMENT from the Mon Cal frigate and TIRED IDEAS.
DIRECTOR: Cut the life support! Strangle and choke!
me: ACKBAR: Now who's the trap, bitches!
Michael: COMIC FOIL: I'm already dead.
ACKBAR: Oh hey baby . Sure I'll go on an awesome space-date with you.
Meanwhile the scene SPIRALS IN TO A PLUGHOLE

me: man, i think we just made the best inernet-fan-movie-thing-of-irony ever
are you thinking what i'm thinking? SHORT FILM
Michael: it's already been shot, produced, and misunderstood by mainstream media
me: damn right
but now we have to make the REMAKE
Michael: dibs on director
I wanna cut my own life support
me: or better yet..some kind of...prequel/sequel...pre-sequel
Michael: you have to do Ackbar all in french though
french ackbar
me: done
Michael: french is romantic so I'm told
me: "C'est un..TRAP!"
Michael: Trappe
me: bam.

Thursday, July 1, 2010


Though I mentioned it when I first started this blog, I would like you all to have a look at my other blog, Jordan On the Road. After rereading some of it, I realize some of it is good and some of it is just crazy. It's worthwhile with passages like:

"The animals are out to get me and I'm not even drunk. Pity me, save me, gratify me...for I am the 21st Century Achilles - doing battle with the mind; this century's Foe of Man."

It's not like you can lose! Examine my incredibly brain-tired ramblings for the low, low cost of NOTHING!

A Gaming Adendum

I think this needs to be stated outside of my earlier post about Activizzard and StarCraft 2. Let's face it, as gamers, gaming companies have us by the balls. They create the games that we want to play, we buy them and that's it. They dictate the rules, the code of conduct and the fashion in which it is to be played and, outside of official patches and unofficial fan creations, the game more or less stays the same. And they always will have the same formula.

We may, as gamers and internet users, sit idly in front of glowing screens and rant about the things that are important to us - this is the only power we have to change ANYTHING. This is important to note. The only way things get changed is by speaking out - whether this be as a protest on the street or a well-meaning blogpost to and about the right people or thing.

What will NOT get things changed is flame wars. We need to be more eloquent with our anger, explaining WHY this kind of things simply won't do anymore. More eloquent than, "yur a fag lolz" and "this is fucking shit, ffffffuuuuuuuu blizzard!11!!!" These outbursts of nonsensical jabbery won't get you anywhere. In fact, they will set back the cause.

The world already sees gamers as ineloquent, infantile, useless leeches of human decency, and when I look at some of the bastards on forums and MMORPGs, it's hard to not agree - sometimes. Most of the time, however, when you have people like my friends or Husky and HD and the professional players they host in their StarCraft tournaments, or just that one nice guy in World of Warcraft who helped you find your way to Orgrimmar rather than shouting at the top of his virtual lungs, "NOOB FAG! ORGRIMMAR IS EASY TO FIND LOL".

Gamers are, actually, intelligent and thoughtful folk but they are often the quieter ones. The louder gamers, the ones Jack Thompson and the angry media latch on to like leeches at a blood party, are the ones who do not represent us. I don't know if I can stress any of that enough. If we want gaming companies to take us seriously when we ask for change, we need to do so not only en masse, but eloquently and thoughtfully. Then, and only then, will they take what we have to say seriously alongside their educated and competent game designers. Mahalo.

The Continued Adventures of Capt. Horatio Adventure

Ok, so that's not really the title up there, but it looks good for now. This is a continuation of the story I started before - does it not intrigue you?!

After the air ship landed at port, Horatio disembarked at pace and hurried down to the corner of Victoria and Tesla Avenue. The place where he was staying was on the other side of town and so Horatio made the quick decision to merely drop by the tailor, drop a bag of money and say, "New suit. Now!" This he knew, of course, would work quite well with his old tailor, Terrance, and prayed it would work the same miracle on any other staff that he might have hired in the intervening period that passed since Horatio's last trip to London.
Clacking with speed down the cobblestone pathway, making careful not to get in the way of any animatronic devices, Horation landed himself quickly at the tailor and, with huff in his breath, uttered, "New suit. Now!" at what he realized was a rather shocking absense of anyone.
He tapped the service bell repeatedly and with vigour until a small, moustachioed, top-hatted man emerged from behind a rouge curtain, "Ah, Terrance, seems you haven't changed at all, though service seems to have slacked."
"Bite your tongue," Terrance said, climbing onto a stool behind the counter to better see Horatio, "I'm still busy when you're not in town, you know."
"Yes, yes," Horatio laughed, "but if I may repeat with the utmost of coherence," he said, clearing his throat, "New suit. Now!"
"I heard you the first time," Terrance said, dismounting his stool, "and I have just the suit for you." Quick as a clockwork gear, Terrance disappeared behind the rouge curtain again, reemerging with a brown, pinstripe, three piece suit, "Yes?"
"Yes," Horatio said, looking the suit up and down, "That'll do nicely."
When he was finished dressing and handing over a bag of coin to Terrance, Horatio was about to leave, but he turned back to Terrance, "How is life in London still?"
"Well," Terrance said, lifting his eyes from the gold coins, "not all that different, not all the same."
"Cryptic, as usual."
"Let's just say some things have changed and some things have not."
"That's pretty much the same statement."
"Life keeps me busy, but I am kept busier by new developments."
"I don't---"
"I'm sorry, Horatio," Terrance said, walking towards the curtain leading to the back of his shop, "as good as it is to see you - and believe me, it is in these troubled times - I'm going to have to ask you to go." And with that, swept behind the curtain.
Though he stared after him for some minutes, Horatio knew he had to be somewhere else and moved off at pace to his meeting. His acquaintance did not like all that much to be kept waiting.